I can't write. I've tried writing a blog a ton of times and nothing is coming out. Part of it is that I don't know what to say, part of it is that there are things I want to say, but don't know how. Writing this blog has been a huge help for me, it's been very therapeutic, being blocked is not good for me.
Writing has always been a huge de-stresser for me, I need to get unblocked so I can get the stress out. I've been working out and reading a lot, that helps with the stress. I'm ready to start writing again, I just need to find some inspiration.
So, I'm blocked. It sucks and is frustrating, but maybe writing this small bit will help unblock me get me back on track and get the juices flowing again.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Lost in a good book
I love a good book. I love getting lost in a book. I love the excitement I feel as I near the end and everything starts falling in to place. I love a book that can make me laugh out loud, cry, sob, bawl, get angry, and most of all I love when a book surprises me.
As a child, my favorites included all fairy tales, anything by Dr. Seuss and of course, my all time favorite, the Little House books by Laura Ingalls Wilder. To this day, when I need to read something familiar, something comfortable, something that feels like home, I re-read all the Little House books from beginning to end.
My taste in books is wide and varied, but I definitely lean towards sci-fi/fantasy as my go to genre.
My current favorite author is Laurell K Hamilton. She writes two series, Anita Blake, the vampire hunter and Meredith Gentry, the fairy princess. I'm in love with both series, but the Merry Gentry series is my favorite of the two.
Other books and series of books that I enjoy and would recommend:
Dean Koontz:
Odd Thomas (the first book in a series of books about the character Odd Thomas, the first is the best, I absolutely love Odd)
Gregory McGuire:
The Wicked Years (the entire series, Wicked, Son of a Witch and Lion Among Men). The books take the Wizard of Oz and put an interesting spin on it, looking through the eyes of the Wicked Witch. They are dark and a little hard to read, but definitely worth the effort.
Audrey Niffenegger:
The Time Travelers Wife (a beautiful love story, I was so caught up in this book, I sobbed through the last 100 pages)
Marisa De Los Santos:
Love Walked In (my most recent book, recommended by my friend, Anna, wonderful love story that keeps you on your toes and is not at all what you expect)
Harper Lee:
To Kill A Mockingbird (a classic)
Stieg Larsson:
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (a mystery, not my favorite genre, but once you get through the first chapter, it takes you on a wild ride you never want to end!)
Anne Rice:
I love most of what Anne Rice wrote, before she "found God", but my favorite was her series about the Mayfair Witches.
George RR Martin:
His series, A Song of Ice and Fire, is probably the best sci-fi series there is. My only complaint is that he wrote 4 of the best books I've ever read with characters that I love, but he's taking forever to finish the series. Thus far there are 4 books and 3 more to come, but no idea when they'll be out. I've read the first 4 books through twice in the last 3 years and am trying very hard to wait patiently for the last 3, my hope is that he's writing the last 3 all at once and they'll come out consecutively when they do. I hope!
JK Rowling:
Harry Potter (what can I say, I love Harry Potter.)
Brandon Mull:
The Fablehaven series (Kendra and Seth go to stay with their grandparents who run a magical preserve for mystical creatures, the 5 book series is wonderful, I only wish there were more)
Stephenie Meyer:
The Twilight series - I was boycotting these books. No way was I going to get caught up in the Bella/Edward/Jacob love triangle. Then everyone started telling me how good the books were, I didn't want to read them, but people I trusted said they were good, so I gave them a shot. I wanted to hate them, I wanted them to be horrible, but they weren't. I think Bella Swan is weak and pathetic and vampires aren't supposed to be shiny and glittery in the sun, but somehow, I didn't hate the books, somehow, they kept me on my toes, kept me entertained and made me fall in love with them. The movies on the other hand, they are crap. I watched the first 2 and they were so awful, I don't understand how people can watch them!
Stephen King:
I'm VERY picky about my Stephen King. Some of his books, I can't stand. I have never been able to get into the Dark Tower series, my mom and brother love them, but I just couldn't get in to them. Cell, to me it was just like he re-adapted the Stand, using a cell phone instead of a plague, not good. Others of his books, I love and could read over and over and over again. The Stand, Rose Madder, Insomnia, Duma Key, The Talisman (co-written with Peter Straub), The Eyes of the Dragon and short stories like The Mist, The Monkey, The Jaunt, Mrs. Todd's Shortcut, keep me riveted and show what a genius Stephen King truly is.
Another thing that makes Stephen King so great is that the novels they turn in to movies, like Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile and Stand by Me are so true to the original story, you don't lose anything in the translation.
My reading list gets longer all the time, which in turn elongates my list of favorites, I can't help myself. I love to read, I love to get lost in another time and place, to fall so in love with a character, I miss them when the book is finished.
As a child, my favorites included all fairy tales, anything by Dr. Seuss and of course, my all time favorite, the Little House books by Laura Ingalls Wilder. To this day, when I need to read something familiar, something comfortable, something that feels like home, I re-read all the Little House books from beginning to end.
My taste in books is wide and varied, but I definitely lean towards sci-fi/fantasy as my go to genre.
My current favorite author is Laurell K Hamilton. She writes two series, Anita Blake, the vampire hunter and Meredith Gentry, the fairy princess. I'm in love with both series, but the Merry Gentry series is my favorite of the two.
Other books and series of books that I enjoy and would recommend:
Dean Koontz:
Odd Thomas (the first book in a series of books about the character Odd Thomas, the first is the best, I absolutely love Odd)
Gregory McGuire:
The Wicked Years (the entire series, Wicked, Son of a Witch and Lion Among Men). The books take the Wizard of Oz and put an interesting spin on it, looking through the eyes of the Wicked Witch. They are dark and a little hard to read, but definitely worth the effort.
Audrey Niffenegger:
The Time Travelers Wife (a beautiful love story, I was so caught up in this book, I sobbed through the last 100 pages)
Marisa De Los Santos:
Love Walked In (my most recent book, recommended by my friend, Anna, wonderful love story that keeps you on your toes and is not at all what you expect)
Harper Lee:
To Kill A Mockingbird (a classic)
Stieg Larsson:
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (a mystery, not my favorite genre, but once you get through the first chapter, it takes you on a wild ride you never want to end!)
Anne Rice:
I love most of what Anne Rice wrote, before she "found God", but my favorite was her series about the Mayfair Witches.
George RR Martin:
His series, A Song of Ice and Fire, is probably the best sci-fi series there is. My only complaint is that he wrote 4 of the best books I've ever read with characters that I love, but he's taking forever to finish the series. Thus far there are 4 books and 3 more to come, but no idea when they'll be out. I've read the first 4 books through twice in the last 3 years and am trying very hard to wait patiently for the last 3, my hope is that he's writing the last 3 all at once and they'll come out consecutively when they do. I hope!
JK Rowling:
Harry Potter (what can I say, I love Harry Potter.)
Brandon Mull:
The Fablehaven series (Kendra and Seth go to stay with their grandparents who run a magical preserve for mystical creatures, the 5 book series is wonderful, I only wish there were more)
Stephenie Meyer:
The Twilight series - I was boycotting these books. No way was I going to get caught up in the Bella/Edward/Jacob love triangle. Then everyone started telling me how good the books were, I didn't want to read them, but people I trusted said they were good, so I gave them a shot. I wanted to hate them, I wanted them to be horrible, but they weren't. I think Bella Swan is weak and pathetic and vampires aren't supposed to be shiny and glittery in the sun, but somehow, I didn't hate the books, somehow, they kept me on my toes, kept me entertained and made me fall in love with them. The movies on the other hand, they are crap. I watched the first 2 and they were so awful, I don't understand how people can watch them!
Stephen King:
I'm VERY picky about my Stephen King. Some of his books, I can't stand. I have never been able to get into the Dark Tower series, my mom and brother love them, but I just couldn't get in to them. Cell, to me it was just like he re-adapted the Stand, using a cell phone instead of a plague, not good. Others of his books, I love and could read over and over and over again. The Stand, Rose Madder, Insomnia, Duma Key, The Talisman (co-written with Peter Straub), The Eyes of the Dragon and short stories like The Mist, The Monkey, The Jaunt, Mrs. Todd's Shortcut, keep me riveted and show what a genius Stephen King truly is.
Another thing that makes Stephen King so great is that the novels they turn in to movies, like Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile and Stand by Me are so true to the original story, you don't lose anything in the translation.
My reading list gets longer all the time, which in turn elongates my list of favorites, I can't help myself. I love to read, I love to get lost in another time and place, to fall so in love with a character, I miss them when the book is finished.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Beast Restaurant
I love food and I'm always up for trying new foods and new restaurants. Friday night, my friend Anna and I went to dinner at Beast. It was an amazing culinary experience. Beast is one of the best restaurants in Portland. The chef was actually on an episode of Iron Chef recently. I was really looking forward to trying her food.
Beast does things a little differently than most restaurants. They serve a 6 course prix fixe meal, no substitutions. The menu changes weekly and what they're serving is what you're going to get. The only exception would be if it's something they could easily take out, otherwise, you eat what they serve you.
The restaurant is very small, seats maybe 30 people. You do communal dining, there are just 2 tables, so you're sitting with people you don't know. Anna and I were looking at it as an adventure, a very special once in a lifetime culinary experience.
The menu for our meal went like this:
Course one - Carrot Creme Fraiche soup with parsely root chips and blood orange oil
The soup was the perfect temperature. It was nice and creamy, the parsely chips gave it a little texture. Great way to start the meal.
Course two - Foie-gras bonbon with sauternes gelee on a sweet cracker, steak tartare and quail egg on toast, chicken liver mousse and pickled shallot on a homemade cracker, salami, pork rillette, a pickled beet and carrots, stone ground mustard with a tiny little pickle and a pickeled fennel salad
I was really scared of this course, I've never been a fan of liver or eating things raw. I started with the pickled beet and carrots, they were very tasty with just the right amount of vinegar. Then I went to the chicken liver mousse, it was a little smoky and a little sweet, I really liked it. Then I tried the pork rillette, it was some pork liver and pork mixed together. It had an interesting texture and was really good with the mustard. The steak tartare and quail egg, though raw were seasoned really well, had nice texture and tasted really good. I saved the foie gras bonbon for last, because the server recommended to eat it that way so it could come to room temperature. I wasn't sure how I'd feel about eating the foie gras, more liver, but with the sweet cracker and gelee, it was amazing. It melted in my mouth. I could have eaten 10 of them!
Before the 3rd course there was a palate cleanser. A berry sorbet, very refreshing.
Third course - Petite New York Steak with slow cooked broccoli and a tomato confiture.
Perfectly cooked steak. I'm not a broccoli fan, but I ate it, I think the slow cooking really brought out some good flavor.
Fourth course - Escarole heart salad with anchovy, parmesan and lemon baguette croutons.
It was almost like a deconstructed caesar salad. It was good.
Fifth course - MY FAVORITE - 3 cheeses, champagne poached apricot, armagnac poached prune, fried marcona almonds, honey and cracked black pepper and fleur de sel shortbread.
The cheeses were so delicious. Eating them with the fruit and honey, just brought out their flavor even more. One of them was soooo creamy and buttery, like a brie, combined with the apricot, it was perfect, it was heaven in my mouth.
Sixth course - Heirloom French Apple and brown butter spice cake with apple cider gastrique and cardamom ice cream.
Not the best dessert I've ever had, but it was good. I think it was a nice way to end the meal. I definitely felt like I was eating a fall harvest meal and the apple spice cake was a good way to finish up.
For someone like me, who enjoys food as much as I do, who appreciates a good meal, whether it comes from a chain restaurant or a small whole in the wall dive or a 5 star rated fine dining establishment, this was one of the best meals of my life and I will never forget it. Anna and I had a wonderful time, 2 and a half hours of talking and enjoying an amazing meal.
http://www.beastpdx.com/
If you love food and want to have the meal of a lifetime, this is where I'd go!
Beast does things a little differently than most restaurants. They serve a 6 course prix fixe meal, no substitutions. The menu changes weekly and what they're serving is what you're going to get. The only exception would be if it's something they could easily take out, otherwise, you eat what they serve you.
The restaurant is very small, seats maybe 30 people. You do communal dining, there are just 2 tables, so you're sitting with people you don't know. Anna and I were looking at it as an adventure, a very special once in a lifetime culinary experience.
The menu for our meal went like this:
Course one - Carrot Creme Fraiche soup with parsely root chips and blood orange oil
The soup was the perfect temperature. It was nice and creamy, the parsely chips gave it a little texture. Great way to start the meal.
Course two - Foie-gras bonbon with sauternes gelee on a sweet cracker, steak tartare and quail egg on toast, chicken liver mousse and pickled shallot on a homemade cracker, salami, pork rillette, a pickled beet and carrots, stone ground mustard with a tiny little pickle and a pickeled fennel salad
I was really scared of this course, I've never been a fan of liver or eating things raw. I started with the pickled beet and carrots, they were very tasty with just the right amount of vinegar. Then I went to the chicken liver mousse, it was a little smoky and a little sweet, I really liked it. Then I tried the pork rillette, it was some pork liver and pork mixed together. It had an interesting texture and was really good with the mustard. The steak tartare and quail egg, though raw were seasoned really well, had nice texture and tasted really good. I saved the foie gras bonbon for last, because the server recommended to eat it that way so it could come to room temperature. I wasn't sure how I'd feel about eating the foie gras, more liver, but with the sweet cracker and gelee, it was amazing. It melted in my mouth. I could have eaten 10 of them!
Before the 3rd course there was a palate cleanser. A berry sorbet, very refreshing.
Third course - Petite New York Steak with slow cooked broccoli and a tomato confiture.
Perfectly cooked steak. I'm not a broccoli fan, but I ate it, I think the slow cooking really brought out some good flavor.
Fourth course - Escarole heart salad with anchovy, parmesan and lemon baguette croutons.
It was almost like a deconstructed caesar salad. It was good.
Fifth course - MY FAVORITE - 3 cheeses, champagne poached apricot, armagnac poached prune, fried marcona almonds, honey and cracked black pepper and fleur de sel shortbread.
The cheeses were so delicious. Eating them with the fruit and honey, just brought out their flavor even more. One of them was soooo creamy and buttery, like a brie, combined with the apricot, it was perfect, it was heaven in my mouth.
Sixth course - Heirloom French Apple and brown butter spice cake with apple cider gastrique and cardamom ice cream.
Not the best dessert I've ever had, but it was good. I think it was a nice way to end the meal. I definitely felt like I was eating a fall harvest meal and the apple spice cake was a good way to finish up.
For someone like me, who enjoys food as much as I do, who appreciates a good meal, whether it comes from a chain restaurant or a small whole in the wall dive or a 5 star rated fine dining establishment, this was one of the best meals of my life and I will never forget it. Anna and I had a wonderful time, 2 and a half hours of talking and enjoying an amazing meal.
http://www.beastpdx.com/
If you love food and want to have the meal of a lifetime, this is where I'd go!
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Happy Birthday, Mom!
Today is my mom's birthday. She is in Las Vegas with 2 of my aunts and another friend. Last year, I made a special dinner for her at home, she wasn't up for doing anything and this year, she's partying it up in Vegas.
My mom has come a long way since leaving my dad. Last year, at this time, she was in a deep depression and very unhappy. This year, she's like a whole new person. She's lost a ton of weight, she's dating and VERY happy!
I'm so proud of my mom. I know it was hard for her to leave my dad, but it was the best thing she could have ever done for herself.
Happy birthday mom, you are the best!!! I love you and I'm so proud of you!!!
My mom has come a long way since leaving my dad. Last year, at this time, she was in a deep depression and very unhappy. This year, she's like a whole new person. She's lost a ton of weight, she's dating and VERY happy!
I'm so proud of my mom. I know it was hard for her to leave my dad, but it was the best thing she could have ever done for herself.
Happy birthday mom, you are the best!!! I love you and I'm so proud of you!!!
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Warring with the scale
Last night, I weighed myself. I did it fully clothed, with shoes on and it was not good. I know, I should never weigh myself fully dressed with clothes, but I did anyway. I know I should never weigh myself just days before my period is supposed to start, but I did anyway. I am SO frustrated with myself!
I can see that my body is changing, that I have muscle definition where there never was before, but I really want to see numbers coming off the scale!
To do that, I know I need to start eating better, but damn it, I LOVE FOOD!
Now that I have a pretty good gym routine going, I average 4 days a week. I really need to start watching what I eat. I don't need dessert every day, what I really NEED is more veggies and more salad! Less sugar, fat and processed foods, more protein, grain and veggies!
While it's really rewarding to see my body changing and my clothes fitting better and differently, I really want to see some change on the scale. I would be happy with just 5 pounds a month coming off, but to get on yesterday and see it say 15 pounds more than I thought it should, HOLY CRAP! Yes, I know, I weighed myself at a bad time, but it still pissed me off!
Fingers crossed, that will motivate me. I know I eat things I shouldn't. I know that it's good to treat myself once in a while, but I don't need to do it every day.
Why does food have to taste so good??? Why can't my favorite foods be veggies and not carb laden sweets and breads???
I'm going to start keeping a food journal. It has always helped in the past to write down every thing I eat and while I don't know how many calories are in everything, it will give me a good idea where I'm messing up and where I can make changes.
Hopefully in a month, I'll be able to come back and write a blog about the numbers on the scale going down. I just need to stay focused on my goal. Size 18, that's what I want to be again. I'm SO close, I can taste it. Just 20 or so pounds. That's nothing.
I CAN DO THIS!
I can see that my body is changing, that I have muscle definition where there never was before, but I really want to see numbers coming off the scale!
To do that, I know I need to start eating better, but damn it, I LOVE FOOD!
Now that I have a pretty good gym routine going, I average 4 days a week. I really need to start watching what I eat. I don't need dessert every day, what I really NEED is more veggies and more salad! Less sugar, fat and processed foods, more protein, grain and veggies!
While it's really rewarding to see my body changing and my clothes fitting better and differently, I really want to see some change on the scale. I would be happy with just 5 pounds a month coming off, but to get on yesterday and see it say 15 pounds more than I thought it should, HOLY CRAP! Yes, I know, I weighed myself at a bad time, but it still pissed me off!
Fingers crossed, that will motivate me. I know I eat things I shouldn't. I know that it's good to treat myself once in a while, but I don't need to do it every day.
Why does food have to taste so good??? Why can't my favorite foods be veggies and not carb laden sweets and breads???
I'm going to start keeping a food journal. It has always helped in the past to write down every thing I eat and while I don't know how many calories are in everything, it will give me a good idea where I'm messing up and where I can make changes.
Hopefully in a month, I'll be able to come back and write a blog about the numbers on the scale going down. I just need to stay focused on my goal. Size 18, that's what I want to be again. I'm SO close, I can taste it. Just 20 or so pounds. That's nothing.
I CAN DO THIS!
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Beautiful Fall Weather
I drove to pick up lunch today and the weather outside is absolutely gorgeous. I really hope it sticks around for a couple more weeks.
This Friday, my mom, brother, nephew, his girlfriend and I are taking off to the beach for the day with the dogs. We don't mind if it's raining, but it would be better if the weather were like today.
Sunday, I'd really like to go on a hike on Mt. Hood. One of the most beautiful places I've ever been, Little Crater Lake. It's a very small lake, but it's really deep and so clear. I'd like to hike from there to Timothy Lake on a day like today, not so much if it's pouring down rain. If I wait much longer, the lake and trail will be covered in snow and I won't be able to get there:( I meant to go all summer and now I'm kicking myself for waiting!
Our summer took so long to get going and it seems like it ended really abruptly! Now I'm wishing I would have done all the things I wanted to while I had the chance. I will admit, I am excited for fall. I love watching the leaves change. Hockey season starts and of course, my favorite holiday, Halloween!
Hopefully, the weather will stay nice just for a couple more weeks. Long enough for me to get in my day trip to the beach, my hike on the mountain and for me to visit the pumpkin patch, I look forward to that trip ALL year:D
This Friday, my mom, brother, nephew, his girlfriend and I are taking off to the beach for the day with the dogs. We don't mind if it's raining, but it would be better if the weather were like today.
Sunday, I'd really like to go on a hike on Mt. Hood. One of the most beautiful places I've ever been, Little Crater Lake. It's a very small lake, but it's really deep and so clear. I'd like to hike from there to Timothy Lake on a day like today, not so much if it's pouring down rain. If I wait much longer, the lake and trail will be covered in snow and I won't be able to get there:( I meant to go all summer and now I'm kicking myself for waiting!
Our summer took so long to get going and it seems like it ended really abruptly! Now I'm wishing I would have done all the things I wanted to while I had the chance. I will admit, I am excited for fall. I love watching the leaves change. Hockey season starts and of course, my favorite holiday, Halloween!
Hopefully, the weather will stay nice just for a couple more weeks. Long enough for me to get in my day trip to the beach, my hike on the mountain and for me to visit the pumpkin patch, I look forward to that trip ALL year:D
Monday, October 4, 2010
To R
Please don't feel bad, I don't. I enjoyed the time we spent together. I knew this wasn't going to last forever. I won't lie, I thought there might be a slight chance that something would happen, but in my heart, I knew all along you weren't ready and that I needed to enjoy you while it lasted and I did, I really did.
I know you're going through a really rough time and I'm sorry. I feel really bad and I wish there was something I could do to help you.
I wish you all the best and I have no hard feelings.
Please take care of yourself! I wish you lots of love and happiness in your life. I know things are really hard right now, but they will get better. You are an amazing man and deserve nothing but the best, never settle for less than that.
I'm going to leave you with one of my favorite quotes:
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so eventually you learn to trust no one but yourself and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can come together." Marilyn Monroe
I know you're going through a really rough time and I'm sorry. I feel really bad and I wish there was something I could do to help you.
I wish you all the best and I have no hard feelings.
Please take care of yourself! I wish you lots of love and happiness in your life. I know things are really hard right now, but they will get better. You are an amazing man and deserve nothing but the best, never settle for less than that.
I'm going to leave you with one of my favorite quotes:
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so eventually you learn to trust no one but yourself and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can come together." Marilyn Monroe
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